| sister died, looking for appropriate memorial tattoo |
Question:
I lost my aunt this last summer. and wanted to get something in
memory of her. but didn't want to get anything like I'd seen in other
memorial tatts.. So I found a drawing idea that I liked (a fairy) and
incorporated things for my aunt.. its holding a rose and sitting among other
plants. (my aunt loved to garden and her favorite flower was a rose). I then
went looking for a picture that could incorporate all of that. I found it
and I got the tattoo this morning.. 2 days before what would have been my
aunt's 69th bday. Its beautiful.. and everytime I look at it I think of
her..
Answer:
- Be sure the person you're doing this in memory of would
approve of the tattoo. ie don't get a tattoo in honor of your dead
grandmother who never liked your tattoos anyhow. that would cause me to
write even more on using dead people as an excuse to get ink, & then
everyone could call me incompassionate & we could all have a good laugh.
- I see it everyday...........kinda silly when in the middle of tattooing
a nice cross and rose with "in loving memory of " in it and the guy
says "ya that is my grandmother she hated tattoos"....somehow that makes it
seem almost disrespectful.
- On the other hand, don't we need to uhm, "personalize" memories - and
memorials? What I mean to say is, I wouldn't say I'd get a memorial tattoo
*for* the person it's dedicated to - if they're dead, they can't see it anyway
(and I don't mean any disrespect to the dead here, sorry if that sounded too
sarcastic, it's my early morning English).
I'm convinced you should always get tattoos for yourself, for the simple reason
that they are on you and on no one else (I don't want to collect other people's
images). And if it's a memorial tattoo, *you* get it because *you* need, or
want, to grapple with some loss, deal with some lack, show your love towards
the dead person. But it's on you, and it says something about the person
remembered in the tattoo AND a lot about you (the way you choose to commemorate
someone does). Grief is within yourself, the trigger (someone's death, maybe)
can belong to the outside world, but in order to live on, you don't need to do
something about that person (which you can't anyway), but you need to come to
terms with your own feelings. If a tattoo feels appropriate, get it. If it
doesn't, don't. Who needs excuses?
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